Ricky Ricardo, Is That You?

drums

Guys are weird, we all know this, it’s just a fact in this business that we get to hear some very odd things they tell us and do for us. It never ceases to amaze me ones will pay for an audience. I’ve had men play me songs on the guitar, sing, and even read poems they wrote. Mind you they are paying me money to listen to this. This week I had a new activity, I had a man playing the drums-with his cock-to entertain me.

I have no idea what sorts of things go through their minds when they pick up the phone with the intention of performing for someone. It is like they are getting ready for their show on stage. I will never forget the man that used to have me watch Youtube videos with him and he wanted us to begin them at the exact same second so they were in sync and he proudly sang the theme song to “Eight is Enough”, among others. I have had a few do such things, like the man that told me, at age 48, he was thinking of embarking on a singing career and becoming the next Elvis. To which I was then treated to a performance of “How Great Thou Art”. I can promise you, he sounded nothing like Elvis as he claimed to before he began.

It’s kind of sad that ones are so convinced they have a talent to share that they are not able to find a real life audience for that they are literally willing to pay to have ones listen to them, yet it’s never long until one comes along, usually only a few weeks between ones that call with things like this. Maybe they are too shy to go to an open mic night or the equivalent to showcase their believed talents for real, so I am a safe option to play to.

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