Fucking Unusual Items

You often hear of men choosing to masturbate with unusual items during phone sex calls. The other day though I heard of an item being used I’d never heard of before being used in ones masturbation. A suitcase. A hard shelled suitcase to be exact. I’m not quite sure how erotic a piece of luggage could be. It’s not soft, it’s not erotic, it’s not sexy, yet this man said he was watching porn and had a suitcase nearby. Not sure if he’d recently made a quick trip out of town and hadn’t unpacked yet, or what. He said he got some paper towel, laid it on top and climbed on and humped it.

Now this man has called many times using toys of various types. Fleshlights, pocket pussies, his hand, leaning against a desk and holding his cock down and humping it. But a suitcase? I was speechless at the choice of items. Surely ones hand would be preferable to luggage? Not much surprises me anymore. Now that Halloween is almost upon us, many men turn to the humble, inexpensive choice of a pumpkin to fuck. Bizarre though that choice might be, it seems more natural a choice than luggage.

It’s natural, soft, the inside of it slippery and wet. You can cut a hole to size. I can understand a pumpkin. I cannot understand choosing a suitcase. In fact, I told him to buy a pumpkin the next time he’s at the store to give it a try. He seemed shocked at such a suggestion though. Yet a suitcase seemed a good choice in his odd mind. He is one of the stranger ones that calls. I’ll never look at a suitcase the same way again. The odd choices that horny men can make never cease to amaze me.

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Swinging Couples

It’s surprising how many older male callers, usually widowed, will mention when their wives were alive they were swingers. Some had only a couple or two they’d swap and swing with, others would go to full blown events with lots of people to choose from they went to. Many of these men not only miss their wives if they are now past away, but the swinging element of their sex life as well. For most, it seems once their wife passes away, that’s also the end of their swinging adventures. Many will mention how their wife was even more into it than they were, especially if they would swing with younger men and couples.

Younger callers you get into cuckold, but not so much swinging like the older ones. Makes you wonder if it’s more of an older couple thing that was more popular decades ago than now. There’s still huge conventions with thousands of swingers from all over the world that travel to them to find some sexual fun. Seems odd to go to conventions to have sex with strangers from all over the world, but if that’s what they’re into and both partners want it, there’s obviously a demand for such conventions.

It’s always existed, but it seems it might have been more popular in the sixties and seventies. You’d have more people you knew personally, since there was no internet to meet strangers on, and before AIDS it wasn’t as risky as it could be now. People will always have their fun, risky or not, but at least with swinging, there’s not the sneaking around behind your partners back. It’s all out in the open and usually in the same room, so it’s all out there and consensual. What’s odd to some is acceptable and normal to others.

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Small Penis Encouragement?

Most guys that call that admit they have a small penis want to be humiliated about it, which was why I was left a bit speechless when a man called and said he did have a small penis, four inches, but he wanted the opposite of humiliation. I was perplexed as to what he meant. Then he said he wanted praise for his small penis, that it was going to be just what I wanted. That I couldn’t be happier than to have his perfect sized four inch penis. He really is living in fantasy land to think any woman would be happy with that size, but sure, I’ll go along with it!

I can honestly say in all my years of talking to guys with small dicks, he’s the only one that’s wanted this spin on it. Not all with small dicks want humiliation, that’s true, many don’t, they just want the size ignored, but to be small and want praise for it was comical to say the very least. Guys do have odd fantasies, but if he wants to imagine his tiny dick as appealing, by all means, think that. It’s not quite like breasts, where all guys want a woman with large breasts. Some do genuinely prefer smaller breasts, and perhaps there is some woman out there with a preference for small cocks, but I’ve yet to talk to such a woman.

A guy need not be huge or over sized, but average is fine for most, but to specifically want a small one, that’s not your average perspective for sure. He wanted me to say over and over how much I love his four inch penis, that it is just the perfect size for me, that I couldn’t imagine wanting anything more than what he has. It was funny, but he seemed to have a good time.

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Calling for Help

It’s surprising how many men call phone sex lines seeking some kind of therapy. Many do have problems that would be best sorted out by professional psychiatrists, but of course many would be too embarrassed to talk to someone face to face about their disturbing fantasies. Some also then have a fantasy about the therapist. Taking her on the couch, bending her over the desk, to act out the twisted fantasies they have described to her over many sessions. They like to imagine she’s secretly turned on by their depraved admissions they think of while masturbating. Some that have no real experience with women, imagine the therapist being the one that would introduce them to the world of sex for the first time.

One phone sex caller that only ever talked about therapists had a bizarre fantasy where he wanted to physically fight the therapist, a full knock down, drag out fight with kicks and punches and bloodying one another up. It was quite odd and he eventually got blocked due to the levels of violence he wished to talk about. It would always start as therapy then move to physical beatings complete with groans and grunts of simulated pain noises.

Most are not like that, but many do like the idea of the doctor and patient becoming sexually involved, even though that is not a good idea in real life. The taboo of having this woman submit sexually to them after they’ve revealed their deepest, darkest fantasies to her arouses many no end. The whole lady doctor thing is far more involved than just a psychiatrist. It involves female doctors of all descriptions they would be getting touched by and made to ejaculate. Telling someone what is in your fantasies can make you vulnerable and they love revealing that to someone and then taking them physically, switching those power roles.

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Toilet Slave

What you may ask just exactly is a “toilet slave?” It’s beyond disgusting, that’s what it is, yet some callers do wish to talk about the grossest of the gross, which this definitely falls into. They want a woman to either sit on their face directly, or squat over them and well, you can guess what they want the woman to do. Now not all ladies will do all calls, personally this is not a topic I’d be discussing myself, but some will be happy to entertain you and talk about you “drinking their golden nectar.” I’m sure you get the idea.

Years ago shortly after I became an operator someone called and asked if I’d talk about “watersports.” I could only think of water polo, yes, I’m serious, and told them I couldn’t possibly understand what water polo had to do with phone sex. Needless to say, they didn’t call, they’d messaged me beforehand. A few months later a man asked if I was ok discussing “hard sports.” Again, I had no clue what he was talking about, so I looked it up online. Nope, not talking about shit, thank you very much. How ones can be drawn to such topics, I’d never be able to grasp, but some do indeed wish to talk about these things while jerking off.

Many men that call are submissive, and love the idea of a dominant woman relieving themselves on them and slurping up their “leavings.” One caller told me he’d love to be tied up in the back of a van, naked, helpless, restrained by ropes in a parking lot and have a woman come into the back of the van and shit on him. He also wanted to receive golden showers in a hotel bathtub. Nope. Not for me, sorry, not going there.

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